Everyone's a Mama

Here in Las Terrenas we’ve had enough discussion of teenage pregnancy, and we’ve seen enough teenage pregnant bellies to dispute the assumption that it’s common and commonly accepted. But our time with prepubescent girls at the library has allowed us to understand another side to the equation. Girls aren’t just getting pregnant because because they don’t know better, or because sex = money and that’s that. Peer pressure is seemingly a major motivator.

Ever seen the Lifetime movie “Pregnancy Pact”? Unfortunately, I have. And as surprising as the event was in the states, I can’t imagine it making even headlines in Las Terrenas.

Here’s what I mean. At the library any given day we tend to have 15 to 20 of the same girls, ages 6-11. Though I expect these girls to read and play freely and run around making messes of their projects – and don’t get me wrong, some do – there is a handful who take it upon themselves to be overly helpful. While others are beading, they’re cleaning up. If 6 year olds are misbehaving, a couple 10 year olds will grab their hands and lead them to a corner in the library to read to them. They independently host story hour with the younger children and practice reading. It’s wonderful, but I can’t help feeling sorry they’re missing their own fun.

I continuously question their home life. Most say they enjoy school, but they love helping their mother clean and cook because it’s easy. In addition, more than I’d like to count have happily admitted there are days they miss school. I’m appalled but try to conceal my shock when they calmly state, “Of course, my mother works and I look after my sisters.”

Wait a second – you’re 10 years old and you stay home with your siblings? Most 10 year olds in the states aren’t even trusted to care for themselves, let alone a less capable child!

In addition, some young girls show up with their siblings in tow. Naiobi is 10 years old and every afternoon she strolls in with a bottle in hand and her 2-year-old sister trailing behind her.

Other days, 10-year-old Surieli shows up with her 4-month-old niece for an afternoon of projects while the mother of the baby, Surieli’s 16-year-old sister, works at a restaurant nearby. Even if Surieli has homework to get done, there’s the baby on her lap always working to distract her. What surprises me further is that plenty of the other young girls and boys (Stephen especially) are happy to help out. Even students Surieli doesn’t know (I’ve asked) will reach over and take the baby off her hands. What I’m thinking is, wouldn’t you rather be playing Uno?

So while I’m considering the consequences and missed opportunities due to teenage pregnancy, these young girls don’t mind the household to-do’s, and by age 10 they are their own mother. Most of these girls are incredibly smart, but what we dismay as irresponsible parenting is what we may come to understand as a building point for family education – these girls are impressively responsible.